Can a 12 yrs old childs name be changed to the stepfathers last name if the father has a restraining order ?

My husbands ex is in law enforcement along with her current husband. They filed a restraining order against him in behalf of the child because my stepson told his mom whn he dropd him off he had been drinking. We couldnt hire an attorney when the order was filed and her attorney never returned his calls to settle out of court. They live in a small town where everyone knows everybody. Two years ago she had swore she would do everything in her power for him not to see his dad or any other family. She got away with the first hearing in that town. Her attorney and her came out of the judges chambers before the hearing started and the judge informed us our attorney had one hour to state his case because come 5 o'clock she was leaving. I just dont think we will win now that she wants him to change his name to her husbands and drop his first name because its the same as his dads. This woman has been a tick on our side since the child was two. Since shes a deputy she looks up his record all the time and they have never done anything to her. How do we know? Her own mother told us. Has my husband screwed up? Yes, he has he is human but does love his son.