Who can I trade Mike Pelfrey, Pablo Sandoval, and Jason Bay for?

I don't need your team. I need everyone else's team. How could I possibly know what you can trade them for? Why don't you want them... because they are underperforming? Well, is there anyone in your league that doesn't realize they are underperforming? Maybe a Mets fan who'll look at Pelfrey's overall numbers instead of his last couple of starts?